Happy Birthday to Me!

Well here I am celebrating my 28th birthday (hannah pauses to sing the Happy Birthday song to herself and proudly does a 28th bday dance) and you know what it doesn't feel that bad, this year and for the first time ever I havn't had my usual "August freak out" ritual which would consist of a whole lot of thoughts about "What the heck i'm doing with my life?" OR "Whats my purpose in life?" OR just generally "Help Me God ... Help Me Help Me Help Me!!".


Thinking about it there are 2 main reasons why I havn't taken part in the usual birthday ritual this year:

1. I dont have the time.. hahaha..there is so much going on with the whole NZ move thing PLUS Leaving do's, holidays, Birthdays, Housewarmings, general catch ups with people, doctors appointments, prayer meetings...Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

2. I can see part of the plan.. I think the Freak Out ritual each year was because inside I was not only dealing with getting older but MORE SO the fact that i still didn't know what i wanted to do with my life and that frustrated me...I see part of the plan now which totally helps you to move forward...Yippee!

To be honest even though i havn't been through the freak out ritual this year i did (I feel like i'm at confession..hahaha) for a small split second go down the "closer to 30" thought pattern. Have you ever seen that F.R.I.E.N.D.S episode where Rachel turns 30?

If not you should..its really funny Rachel is totally freaking out and they are all there sitting at the kitchen table in Joey's apartment remenising about how they celebrated there 30th Birthdays.

Rachel gets to this point where she has figured it all out and feels much better about turning 30 because she doesn't want to start having kids till she's 35 but then she wants to be married for a couple of years so thats about 33 then it will take a year to plan the wedding thats 32 but then she's gunna wanna be with the guy for about 2 years before so that leaves her till she's 30 then she gets alittle sad and breaks up with her boyfriend because time is running out..hahahahahaha!

Although its funny i did have that moment where i was going through it all in my head for me and i figured out that i probably wont start to have kids till i'm 34 or 35..hahaha..then i thought whats the point of getting caught up about something i don't (at this moment and maybe never will) have any control over - life is for living and as long as I'm living it for God all the rest will sort itself out!

Which leads me to **cough cough** (hannah clears her throat)

Ladies and Gentleman I propose a toast to..... myself (of course).... May the next year be full of new adventours, new friendships and new glimpses of my creator. Take my advice Hannah - don't be so hard on yourself, keep trusting God and listen to him, love people and never stop laughing at yourself.

Till next time my friends

Hanski

Xx